3 AM in Julius’s Mind

3 am in Julius’s mind

I got some deep seeded anger issues only he can solve

But I got the perfect band aid, its the weed I’m on

And this is my resolve, cover my problems with smoke

Break it down light it up until I God damn choke

A loss of all hope and a retreat from all reason

Rob my life of emotion, my feelings get deleted

And I’m so defeated, taking Ls like Detroit

I can’t make sense but I can make joints?

Fuck what’s the point of letting people in

Because once you do the beginning is the end

I’m swimming in sin and drowning in fate

Laying nude in my bed, cuddled up with hate

Such a damn disgrace that I’ve let myself fade away

Zombie mindset, spend my days in a haze

Dazed and amazed by the range of my torture

God playing games, gambling with my fortune

A portion of me knows that he’s the only way

But the bigger part refuses to ever return from being astray

So this is what I say, I’m narcissistic and I love it

If you don’t? Fuck it

And fuck you and everybody I never could tell you what trust is

And I lust this mentality of war and pain

Back against the wall obstinate until you know my name

No need for fame, just need you to hate me

It’s the fuel to my engine so do not race me

and i’m facing the reality of life now

I wanna change Shit but don’t know quite how

So I fight. Pow. Struggle until I win it.

I’m celebrating my death like I ran through the finish

And yes I’m smitten with the thought that you will miss me

Regretting what you did or didn’t do, eyes real misty

So I’m kissing goodbye to it all

Elevate, fly. Journey the sky’s til I fall

So check it out Doll, the build up was for the break down

Because I’m tearing away from you my tears outlining my face frown

A crowd of emotion busting through my souls door

As I writhe in pain pouring my heart on the floor

Just to leave it there so you can see what im losing

My brain cells depleted from this mental bruising

Illusions abound as my time becomes naught

My mind replays loses in wars that I’ve fought

Can’t win for losing so instead I avoid and rise above

leaving feelings deep down forgetting my losing fight with love


2 Responses to “3 AM in Julius’s Mind”

  1. […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Julius McFly, Julius McFly. Julius McFly said: Motivated by Drake – 9 AM in Dallas …. LEEGOO!!! https://thatguymcfly.wordpress.com/2010/12/14/3-am-in-juliuss-mind/ […]

  2. pretty strong right there.

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