Lost and Found

Lost and Found

I met her and her love made my soul insane
Enraged at having to wait to see her each day
But I coped and gained patience, we were one and the same
Then I started fucking her mind, and that’s when the thoughts….
Came
We matched on a level unlike any other
She would enter the room and my body would hover
And shudder, straight shake goose pimples on my skin
My mouth would water at the thought of eating her in sin
Desserts. Leave me deserted
When her mind goes elsewhere
Wandering in the world so lost with no help here
And yet in the sand footprints look doubled
When I can’t walk she starts to carry me, rescue me from trouble
Because she’s my one and only
I’m never lonely
When we touch we make love, it’s not fucking and boning
It wasn’t just a fling or a tumble in the sack
It was like best friends because we had each other’s backs
Until one day my immaturity returned
Prodigal son of my thoughts resulted in her getting burned
And scorched and left hurting because I fucked with her mind
I couldnt be a man yet, I met her at the wrong time
And time is all I had and time is what I wasted
Spent my nights fucked up and my mornings mentally tainted
And emotionally drained from the love that I gave away
It’s sad because I’m stuck and I regret it each day
But fuck to be honest I miss you and I don’t though
Because when I have you I hate you and I want you to go
You did me the same that I did you
Except I stopped and you kept going, left my soul in icu
Now when I see you, my stomach does backflips
And my throat starts to burn because I’m puking up acid
It’s fucking fantastic that I regret so many actions
And you act like ya shits flawless but really ya shits drastic
You stepped out and I stepped out
Then you stepped out, and I realized you sleeping at another nigga house
I gotta say, much was lost, love was primary
Still got some left, weighed down by the chip my shoulder carries
Deep down its buried, drowning in the dirt
So you see no beating from my heart through my shirt
I must say I feel empty, shallow in my soul
Trying to feel myself up with anything, that’s my goal
So as My grip slips tighter
I squeeze more looser
As I push away my past
And grab hold of my future
Confused by the fact that
My only crutch is my confusion
No where to lean or stand
Just more ways to be a loser
I’m lost not found
Can’t hear any sound
except the torment of my screams
Forced to watch on repeat the failure of my dreams
I’m lost

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